blessed

I want to share how blessed I feel. My mother and my grandmother instilled in me the value and love of family. I have extended that to friends who are the family I have added on my own. And I am my most happy when I can spend time visiting my loved ones whether it's by phone or in person.

I feel especially happy today because I had nice long phone visits with my Aunt Georgia (my mother's sister) and my Aunt Dorothy (my grandfather's sister, 95 years old!). Hearing how they are doing and sharing my news with them makes me feel so loved. And the fact that I believe they feel my love for them makes me feel even better about myself. There is nothing better on Earth than sharing love.

Wishing you time to spend with your loved ones!

Atypical

I just started watching a new Netflix series called "Atypical." The main character is a teenager who deals with symptoms of autism. He said, "I wish I was normal." A friend said, "dude, no one is normal." I love that.

community service and parenting

I was thinking about community service and parenting. Becoming a parent is the ultimate volunteer service. Parents commit 24 hours, 7 days a week at a minimum of 18 years. And they are not only helping their immediate family, they are raising citizens who will affect our local and global communities now and in the future.

Sending a big thank you to parents raising conscientious citizens! And gratitude to all who volunteer in their community!

the next great adventure

What do you think about death? Are you scared? Do you ignore it? I hope you don't mind me discussing it.

I don't think death should be taboo. Not that it's my favorite subject. But I lost my dad recently so I've been thinking a lot about it.

I don't think I'm scared of it. But it is not my time yet. I may feel differently when my end is near. I heard someone call it "the next great adventure" and that's how I like to think of it. If there is no life after death, I won't have anything to worry about. If I'm damned to hell, so be it. I think I live a decent life and I am not worried. I like to believe that our soul lives on in some form or another. I look forward to the discovery, though I am in no rush. I hope that doesn't sound morbid.

And for those who go before us, I feel their love with me (as much as I would rather have them here). 

Wishing you comfort when you need it most. 

thoughts

A thought while meditating today:
It is interesting to think about our energy coming from deep within the earth, through our body and into the far reaches of the universe. We can sit with God and see all of time and space in front of us. So on one hand we are outside looking in. But on the other side we are all one – humans, planets, galaxies – so we are inside looking out.

I feel the need to process these ideas, so I am sharing them with you. My thoughts in writing help me see things more clearly. And by sharing them with you I might get some of your input. All comments are valuable. I like to know what other people think.

Here is to the pursuit of love and knowledge!

Tears of joy

So happy to see more media devoted to interrupting the cycle of oppression in our country. One of my favorite shows, Switched at Birth, devoted some episodes in season five (seen now on Netflix) to the message of Black Lives Matter.

A hate crime was committed and the perpetrators were given small consequences. One student, Iris, started a hunger strike until the criminals were expelled from the University. They had other demands as well; for example, changing the name of a building from a slave owner to a person of color. It was slow going. The administration was not very sympathetic. Finally, starting with the baseball team, all of the sports teams refused to play until the administration would consider their demands.

Sports teams bring money to universities. The sports teams threatened to take away that money. The administration agreed to expel the perpetrators of the crime and meet with the black student group to discuss their other demands.

I cried to see something so optimistic. A simple peaceful act, stopping the flow of money, made real change. It caused everyone to open their eyes and see the problems that had so long been ignored.

That seems a good avenue to pursue: controlling consumerism to get attention and make a change. I will be keeping my eyes open for ways I might do the same.

Thank you,@Netflix, for bringing thought-provoking stories to a wide audience.

Dear White People

Another @GoodOnNetflix @Netflix – "Dear White People." This was only 10 episodes, a half hour each, but it brought a lot of important issues to light.

A white student asked the black leader – has anything changed with all of your protests? They gave no answer, but I say yes! Showing others things they might be missing does make change. If only to reduce the distance between the racial groups, we have done something good. If more white people would think about their words and actions, we might all be more respectful and kind.

This show is rated for mature audiences. Several scenes inappropriate for teenagers. But for adults, please check it out and think about how you might be perpetuating discrimination simply by ignoring the problem.

My goal is to promote kindness and respect for all!

Ta-Nehisi Coates

Shining some light on a dark subject...racism, part 2.

I just finished reading "Between the World And Me" by Ta-Nehisi Coates.

Coates paints a vivid picture of growing up a black man in America, as it was for him and will be different for his son. Parts of his story have been alluded to in TV and movies. I'm glad to have a real glimpse into a life so different from my own.

It reinforces my despondency over how my ancestors have treated people of color. It also gives me more motivation to make change.

The most important idea I took away from this book, paraphrasing from page 98: that we must look closely at the horrors we have been accepting, let go of the shining example we think we are, and take action against the problems we have not been addressing.

It is not enough to think and behave without racism. We must take steps, even little ones, toward putting an end to oppression in our country. While sharing my thoughts with you is important, I need to share these thoughts with the politicians. With our current Republican administration, we have a steep hill to climb.

What has taken me so long to see this clearly?  It is weighing on my heart that I have been so complacent for the last 46 years. Things are changing. 

antiracist

Shining some light on a dark subject...racism.

I have been deeply saddened by the young Black men being shot by White men, who don't seem to be suffering any consequences. Then, I saw Netflix's "13th" which pointed out that 2 out of 3 inmates are African-American. This is NOT okay!

My book club thought we should read about race relations. I just finished "Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?" By Beverly Daniel Tatum. I had asked myself the same question when I went to college at Syracuse University. According to Ms. Tatum, as we develop our sense of identity, we seek out others who understand us, who share similar experiences. White kids don't encounter racism and so cannot relate to what Black kids experience.

And this doesn't necessarily end. Throughout our lives, we continually mold our identity. So, many people stay within their groups, for comfort level. People like me prefer to find a more diverse group of friends. But it isn't easy. I remember a neighborhood block party where I noticed 3 distinct groups - White, Black and Hispanic. I was not brave enough to introduce myself to a different group. Fortunately, my apartment building was racially mixed, as were our art exhibits, and I made some genuine friends outside my race.

But it is not enough to think and behave antiracist, we must do something to stop racism. Ms. Tatum wrote, "the role of the ally is not to help victims of racism, but to speak up against systems of oppression and to challenge other Whites to do the same." p 109 

So, this is my first step. We need to find our sphere of influence and speak out against racism, to recognize our White privilege and use that strength to interrupt the cycle of oppression that began with slavery and continues today in other forms.

Are you with me?

If you’re interested in reading I found this:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/16-books-about-race-that-every-white-person-should-read_us_565f37e8e4b08e945fedaf49?ncid=engmodushpmg00000004

opposing views

Shining some light on a darker issue…
I have been trying to understand some political issues from the conservative side. I recently watched a documentary on Netflix called "Targeted." It spells out many ideas held by pro-gun groups (gun enthusiasts?).
It was very educational. The most important idea I came across is that pro-gun people believe that our right to bear arms is a way to keep the government in check. If citizens have guns, the government cannot overtake us. I heard – if the government makes all the rules, they get all the guns. If the government disarms us, it is a way to gain control over the people. I heard – there is no "gun control" – there is only "people control."
So I am understanding that pro-gun groups consider gun restrictions as limiting their power to keep the government in check. I can follow the logic, though I don't understand why some limits are offensive. What's wrong with background checks? What's wrong with keeping guns out of the hands of people with mental illness or past criminal behavior?
Another point that seems valid is when I heard – gun restrictions don't keep guns out of the hands of bad guys. If criminals want guns, government restrictions are not going to stop them. I'm guessing most of the guns used by drug dealers and such are obtained illegally.
I learned that the appeal of the right to carry concealed weapons is that it puts uncertainty into the minds of criminals. If the neighbor on the street can pull a gun to stop a crime, it may be less likely the crime will be committed.
So, now I feel I understand pro-gun people a little better. I still think gun restrictions are a good thing – guns are not being eliminated. We are still a long way from reducing gun violence in our country. But maybe the two sides, pro-gun and anti-gun, can cooperate to find ways to stop criminals. Being understanding and respectful of people with opposing views is the only way to promote compromise and cooperation.

Sing 3

These songs I sing around the house make me sad lately, but let's hope for the future.

America, the Beautiful
free to be you and me
God bless America
grand old flag
Little Boxes
My country, 'tis of thee
star spangled banner
This land is your land
yankee doodle

Sing 2

Sing around the house:

blowin' in the wind

Dreams go by

59^th Street Bridge Song

forever young 

Give yourself to love 

How rich the life

How sweet it is

I can't keep it in

moon shadow

Something in the way she moves

The Sound of Silence

sweet baby James
you've got a friend

Sing

Sing around the house:

Can't help falling in love

close to you

Dream a little dream of me

Eight days a week

God bless the moon

Hot diggety, dog ziggety

I will

In my life

Little bitty pretty one

Lollipop

la vie en rose

moon river

that's amore

time in a bottle

The very thought of you

Waltz for a Night

diversity & equality

I was thinking about two words – diversity & equality. They sound like opposites. But they are two things that I hope our country will continue to strive for. The world is a better place when every difference is celebrated and when no matter how different we may be, we are all treated equally.

Yay for diversity! Yay for equality!

Let us rise up together and eclipse all hatred!

patient

1. 1 :  bearing pains or trials calmly or without complaint
2. 2 :  manifesting forbearance under provocation or strain
3. 3 :  not hasty or impetuous
4. 4 :  steadfast despite opposition, difficulty, or adversity

Are you patient? I think I must have been born with a patient gene. 

As a teacher, I had lots of patience for my students. They had struggles, and I think my calm, easy-going manner was helpful.

I have daily frustrations with MS. I have honed my patience over these 20+ years. My mood is always better when I can calmly face my challenges.

 

Now, I am nearing the end of a new test of my will to be calm. I moved to PA in September 2016 and immediately applied for a state program to fund my home health care. The application said "30 to 60" days. It has now been over 5 months!

Sigh. All I can do is wait. I'm tired of complaining but I can't seem to help myself.

Thanks for listening. 

Wishing you patience when you need it!

action

My friend and I were talking yesterday about the fear of what our new administration could do to change our country for the worst. I'd like to share the thing that keeps me hopeful.

Our president and the people he is promoting are to the extreme opposite of the values I hold dear. But I think that having such a drastic difference is instigating the rest of us to step up and work even harder for the things that are important to us.

I have been signing petitions and calling my senators regularly. I'm reading more so that I am aware of changes coming. And my friends are, too.

If you are interested, there is a weekly action list with ideas to stay involved. http://jenniferhofmann.com/…/weekly-action-checklist-democ…/
Here are two of my favorite suggestions:
1 – choose three issues to focus on, including one that may not affect you directly
2 – write a letter to your senators and representatives with the issues most important to you (in addition to calling, emailing or writing in regard to immediate issues)

So, I am hoping that there may be some conservative ideas that will help our country. I am hoping that extreme ideas will encourage debate. And most of all, I'm hoping that love and positive ACTIONS will create a better world.

Let's shine our light and act with kindness and respect!

history

I recently watched “Older than America.”

This is new to me or at least much more detailed than I have known. Apparently, as recently as 1975 Native Americans were forced to send their children to boarding schools. Those in charge claimed to be teaching savages to be cultured. Sadly, not only were they stripping people of their traditional language and customs, there was widespread abuse reported.

The white men who took this country also write the history books. We need to add the parts they left out.

We also need to make sure that such practices do not continue. Every human deserves to live life according to how they see fit. We need to stop people who try to squelch differences. We need to encourage the celebration of differences. We need to appreciate ideas and thoughts that are new to us.

Let us not be the “melting pot” where we all blend into one. We should be a tossed salad with lots of flavors tasted individually.

science

The three-part series from the BBC as seen on Netflix, "Sex, Death and the Meaning of Life" has given me some things to consider. The presenter, Richard Dawkins, looks to science to explain the topics typically explained by religion.

I believe in God because it comforts me to feel I have someone with me always, not to explain the world.

I don't need God to tell me right from wrong. I don't do good things to get into heaven. I don't avoid bad things to stay out of hell. I do what's right because it makes me feel good. 

I believe in life after death because it comforts me. But if this life is all we have, that's okay. This world alone is pretty amazing.

I don't need God to give me a purpose. I determine the meaning I give to my life. We are important, not because God put us here, but because our actions affect the world. And ideally, we want to make the world as good as we can.

Science helps us make sense of the world. Spirituality helps me feel comforted, strong and able to improve myself and the world around me.

What do you think?

dream

Do you have a dream? Did you have one when you were six? Did it change? What did you dream of in high school? How about 20 years after that? Did it stay the same? Did it come true?

When I was six I wanted to be an artist. When I was in high school I thought about teaching and architecture. Along the way, I became a teacher. After that I became an artist. And of course I dreamed of a life similar to my parents. Go to school. Get a good job. Get married. Have children. But beyond that, I didn’t give it much thought. I had expectations for myself until about age 30. But then what?

Education and art are still important to me. I found a wonderful husband but decided not to have children. And then I wrote a book! So now, I have met my goals. I’m proud of what I have accomplished. I’m happy with my life.

What is my dream now? I’m reevaluating. I want something new. I want to continue having an effect on the world. Writing and art will probably be involved. But I think I am going to pursue a more active role with organizations that are working to improve the world. I want to be sure that our current political climate does not go unchecked. I want to do whatever I can to increase kindness and respect for all. My actions may be small but I hope they will be effective.

What do you see for your future? Wishing you all good things!